My one year old has few words to speak so he mostly communicates in code and riddles. “Eassse” is code for “May I have more milk please?” (Of course, he’s that polite; don’t spoil things for me) “Hay Da” is “Hi Daddy”. His riddles, conveyed mainly with body language, are more mysterious.
This morning he was sitting in his high chair. I was getting breakfast ready and he sat there contentedly for a few minutes. As I was setting the table, he stood up and handed me his plate. I guessed he wanted to get down. He had successfully torn his piece of bread into about a dozen small pieces, apparently uninterested in eating it. So I took the plate and put it on the kitchen table, directly in front of him. Wrong move Dad, wrong move. Cries and tears of anguish followed.
I was frustrated. It was a guessing game and I was not winning. My thought was this, “I’m doing exactly what you seem to want me to do and now you’re upset!?!” But as soon as the thought formed in my head, I was able to calm down a bit.
You see, I get what I want all the time, and often it makes me miserable. Why blame a toddler for doing the same thing? The truth is, I often want what is bad for me and when I receive it, I can either realize my foolishness or my frustration.
“…God gave them over in the sinful desires of their hearts…”
It’s a phrase from Paul’s pen that has been bouncing around my head as I’ve preached through Obadiah and Nahum. In those books, God is very active in visiting His punishment on people. But here, Paul speaks of a more passive instrument of His will: simply allowing our wayward hearts to take us where they will.
My heart, my will, my desires are not always to be trusted. But I am thankful for the Holy Spirit who guides me and who is always trustworthy.
Lord, not my will, but yours.
P.S. He didn’t want me to put the plate on the table, he wanted jam on his bits of bread. So there.